It seems as if the past month just flashed by like the tick of the second hand. It’s quite unbelievable, when quantified, the things one can actually achieve when you are no longer tied down by frivolous burdens, take for instance; The Army.

The freedom of living life under my sole dictation (minus the fact that clients fix the times for appointments), is simply quite blissful. No more fixed reveille and lights out (although the truth is even when I was in green I didn’t abide to timings), no more clearing concepts with bosses, in fact, no more barriers to work.

What is a barrier to work? It is basically a structural flaw with organisational bureaucracy that hinders rather than catalyses, a work process. No doubt wisdom accumulated over the years can qualify a senior manager’s position to comment and speak, and if necessarily, change a process, more often than not they are trying to comment on items far off their forte, which results not only in substandard results, but overall decreased proficiency in the name of “clearance”. The end product the client receives is therefore often lacking in creativity and glow.

And of course, it is also the profits. The regular day job earns you a measly performance bonus and annual bonus. A small fraction of the value you truly create. Being self-employed, you take all the returns. Being an employer, you also rake in portions of other peoples returns. Thus, a fixed wage worker is always short-changed.

Valentines passed yesterday, with no particular event to mention. CNY is probably going to be the same, except maybe I will visit the canteen auntie, as she wishes to introduce her daughter to me as a girlfriend. It funny this canteen auntie is always trying to tie me up with someone of the opposite sex. It’s either that I look too damn deprived and she’s being nice, or she’s getting commission for it. Haha… just joking.

Festivals no longer spell excitement for me. Perhaps I have come to the state of dedicating ALL my life to my ventures and from such perspective, profits, development and expansion are my only points of consideration. The rest is trivial, consequentially, discarded. In fact, it doesn’t even feel weird to be working on such days anymore.

It has also occurred to me that I am more soft-hearted than I expected. I actually let someone go for offending me so badly. Then again, on the logical side of things perhaps I do not have the energy and focus to exact vengeance. So much for being the vindictive Scorpio.

I took a close look at the photos my dad brought out the displays, the old days hen the family was still happy and everyone was good with one another. My brothers look so cute, even though they are taller than me now I actually feel like pinching their cheeks. My folks looked happier too. Sometimes I wonder if the lack of finances is really so powerful it could crush a family with over 20 years of bonding.

I have rattled enough. Back to work!