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Wanderwind

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  • Perfection
    Friday, February 24, 2006

    The greatest perfection is most often found in the greatest imperfection. Thus, if I seek to achieve the greatest perfection, I am actually the most imperfect... irony huh?


    Battling Randomness @2:38 AM
    Link to post | 0 said something


    ***


    Adaptability – The Greatest Hurdle to Singaporean Evolution
    Tuesday, February 07, 2006

    This thought actually popped into my head by chance, shortly after I was screwed by a superior from another department for a fumble that was truly not my fault. The screwing session wasn’t really so bad, for I knew that guy in the capacity of a friend from some years back.

    One of the points, he lamented to me, was regarding the fact that the higher you go up the corporate ladder, the less error space you are allowed. So in fact at a lower position it is more blissful, as you will be forgiven for your mistakes.

    I bought the idea for a few seconds, before the internal alarm went off. WTF! I actually think, even for one moment, that it is REALLY blissful being a lower life-form! I then realised this is merely a facet of life that I have almost compromised. The following would be a rough list of compromises I can think of:

    1) The government had decided to take a proactive stand in stomping out smokers, and have raised tobacco taxes at least 3 fold within the past 3 years. A pack of 20 which would cost 5.40 originally would now cost 10.00. This has led to the withdrawal of premium brands, leaving us smokers with only the second rate brands to choose from. We get pissed for a while, but tell ourselves there is nothing we can do to change the way it is. We end up paying more for lousier brands!

    2) Our HDB flat prices are towering, and to purchase a single flat would probably put a household into a pitfall of lifetime debt. We complain about that in our essays in school, and amongst our families and friends. But when we grow up, get married, we tell ourselves, it looks like we have no choice, so we settle for a housing loan and make our hire purchase. Some people might even think, now HDBs are so cheap! And they make this claim while not being able to cough out a cheque 10% of the amount in topic!

    3) Nobody likes to be enlisted into the army as a conscript. Unfortunately this is the law of the country, and so we abide. We enter the army hating the restrictions and uncalled-for tekan. But since we are inevitably stuck in the organisation for 2 good years, we tell ourselves to get used to it. We used to wake up at noon and sleep at 3am, but in the army, we soon find ourselves squirming in orgasm when we are given 2 measly hours of extra sleep time.

    The list goes on…

    As we can see, we are all equipped with the innate ability to adapt. And we use it to delude ourselves into false happiness under the blanket of oppression exerted by greater powers. When you boss is a twit who cannot recognise your talents, you tell yourself to get used to it. When your government raises the cost of living unreasonably, you tell yourself to compromise your own pocket.

    I have also realised that this is really only a Singaporean mentality. We are the only democratic country in which the citizens NEVER speak up, or act up. When some brave soul comes up to voice the underlying displeasure, nobody backs him / her up, even if the sentiments are similar. In fact, we will make a joke out of the person who fought for our rights, for deep down we tell ourselves – “Resistance is Futile”.

    If humans learn through error, then we will never learn, for we are not allowed to make mistakes. If we grow through pursuit of higher objectives we will never grow, for we are constantly trying to settle for lower objectives. If we evolve by breaking new ground and discovering the unknown possibilities, then we will never evolve, for we are more complacent with adapting to the current.

    What a pity…4 million bodies and not a single soul…



    Battling Randomness @8:07 PM
    Link to post | 0 said something


    ***


    Emotional Deficiency
    Sunday, February 05, 2006

    I think I have a problem. Well its not so much of a life and death issue, neither does it actually hinder the processes of my daily life, but it is a problem, and one I didn’t really care to think about until… yesterday.

    After some gathering (CNY again), I accompanied a friend to millennia walk. Apparently the new hype in town, which I have heard of from many friends, is this thing called “Salsa-Dancing”. The basic concept is pair-dancing, and since you do not have to find yourself a partner, it is pretty attractive a deal (exercises and free match-making).

    As usual, my friend, feeling awfully awkward registering alone, decided to put up a mild attempt to coax me into registering together. The conversation went something like that:

    Friend: “Eh come join me lah… you are single right?”

    Me: “I really wouldn’t mind but I don’t think my current schedule allows me to take up another social aspect”

    Friend: “Aiyah, just make friends what, nobody tell you to engage in a relationship.”

    Me: “Of course, but even making friends take time, and I really don’t think its going to add any value to whatever I am doing now.”

    Friend: “You cannot be so calculative. Before you learn to fly you have to learn to walk. Look at the present; don’t keep looking into the future. Life is not like business. Of course in business you plan ahead, but in life you really won’t know what is going to happen tomorrow or the day after. Relationships are not commodities!”

    I was momentarily befuddled. Did I actually view relationships are commodities, as measurables? I think I actually did! In fact, I have been viewing everything as tradable and measurable items. While doing so allows me to take emotion out of the equation and focus on logically closing favourable deals and contracts, it has now become a habit and a perspective of life!

    Do I even feel anymore? Perhaps, but only for a split second before logic takes over. To break down what goes through my head and heart when there is any attraction:

    Heart: “Ahhh… I feeling a little excited and intrigued…”

    Head: “Shut Up!”

    Heart: “But…”

    Head: “SHUT THE FUCK UP!!! Ok look here, that chick is no doubt hot and sexually appealing. From her looks and demeanour she seems ready to start a conversation. Her fashion sense makes her seem like an office executive, so she is probably another mindless automaton of the economy. Look at that handbag and all those accessories, another city dweller all absorbed in shallow narcissism. The beauty is only skin deep, not suitable, period!”

    Heart: (shuts down completely)

    I think I really have a problem, hahaha!


    Battling Randomness @10:51 PM
    Link to post | 0 said something


    ***


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